An incredible bedtime with the twins...

I've had a hard day. I've struggled with wondering why we have 3 healthy boys. It is the anniversary of a childhood friend losing her two boys in a tornado. Her strength truly amazes me. A close friend was admitted to the hospital at 21 weeks with her baby boy. Praying to make it to viability. I encouraged her to go for that last pregnancy that would be normal after a multiple pregnancy that was anything but. A woman I met through Itworks lost one of her twin boys at 17 months old to SIDS. They're 3rd birthday was this weekend and she needed prayers. Prayers for peace. Prayers to survive the day. Ashley & Thomas are preparing for the one year of precious Miloh being in heaven. Why do I have my boys here with me? I struggle with this and today more so than other days. Today I voiced this to Brandon as I cried this evening. I just don't understand. 

We put the twins to bed together like we always do. Then an hour later I heard tears. So I went in & Drake was crying. Hunt is apologizing. Apparently he poked his brother in the eye. After calming Drake, Hunt tells me he just wants to sleep alone. This is night 2 of him telling me this. Drake is begging to sleep with him saying he can't see out of his hurt eye and needs Hunter. Hunt finally with tears says Drake can sleep with him, but why doesn't momma kiss his eye to make it better? It makes his boo boos better. So Drake agrees, I can kiss it. Looks at Hunt and tells him okay Hunt you can sleep alone. Thank you Drake comes from Hunt's sweet voice. 

Hunt jumps to the bottom bunk and I lay with Drake playing with his hair just looking at him.  I tell him I miss holding him when he was a baby. He tells me I loved to hold daddy when I was a baby. Hunt chimes in and asks if daddy held him too. I tell them yes we alternated which baby we held. 

Then comes the moment that changed me forever.

"Do you love having 3 boys momma?" - Drake

"More than anything in the world I love having 3 baby boys!" - Me

"You are gonna have lots of big boys one day momma, but we will always love you" - Drake

"I'm gonna love you no matter how big you are & you'll always be my babies!" -Me

"Why are you crying momma?" - Drake 

"I'm just so blessed to have you 3 boys! Do you know how blessed we are?" - me

"Yes momma! You love calling me Drake, & Hunter Hunter & Luke Luke?" - Drake

"Yes I do love my babies names! Daddy & I picked them!" - Me

"I'm named after my daddy, I'm DrakeBrandon  Olive." - Drake

"I'm named after my PawPaw, I'm Hunter Paul Olive. What is Luke's actual name?"  - Hunter

"Luke's name is Luke Arthur Olive after grandpa!" - me

"Like Aiden Arthur Kelly!" - Drake

"yes, grandpas name is Arthur Kelly"- me

"He is grandpa Arthur?"- Drake

"Yes his name is Arthur & he is your Grandpa!" - me

Then we did our normal goodnight kisses & hugs. Prayers before I walked out. 

I swear God spoke through my child tonight. It was incredible. I came out of their room and just cried and cried to Brandon. I cannot believe he really asked me if I loved having 3 boys and told me I would one day have lots of big boys and they would always love me!! 

My heart is aching tonight for the people I love. Please know, I don't take a moment for granted with my babies. I pray for your peace. I pray for your comfort. With all my love !